As of late, we here at Cult Carpe had fallen into a bit of a funk. Much to our dismay, it seemed that the world had suddenly become sane and humorless, leaving us with nothing to mentally chew on. Oh we of little faith.
A-one, a-two, a-three, everybody sing! “Ooooooooooooooooooklahoma, where Baphomet comes sweeping down the planes…”
As previously reported elsewhere on this site:
With the approval and backing of many Oklahoma state lawmakers, a monument with The Ten Commandments was erected on the lawn of the Oklahoma state capital in 2012. Recently, a satanic group from New York (where else?) came forward seeking to have a monument displayed in honor of Beelzebub. Then, a Hindu group announced that they wanted a statue of the Hindu deity, Lord Hanuman on the capital grounds. Thereafter, PETA announced that it wants to hang a banner there that contains religious symbols and promotes a vegan lifestyle.
It couldn’t have ended there, we were sure. There is a cosmic party going on, and everyone wants in. Now, The Church of The Flying Spaghetti Monster, and The Church of the Latter-Day Dude want monuments at the Oklahoma state capital.
As is being reported all over the place this morning, the Satanic group from New York (where else?) has now unveiled a depiction of what its devilish monument would look like.
The proposed monument features a seven feet tall Satan, aka Baphomet, with a pentagram behind him, and a couple of cute little kids standing in captive admiration at either side of the cuddly, goat-like creature.
As might be expected, Oklahoma lawmakers are outraged.
“I think you’ve got to remember where you are. This is Oklahoma, the middle of the heartland,” Rep. Don Armes said. “I think we need to be tolerant of people who think different than us, but this is Oklahoma, and that’s not going to fly here.”
Rep. Earl Sears said that the proposed monument is “an insult to the good people of the state.”
According to the Satanic Temple’s website, its particular brand of Satanism “seeks to separate Religion from Superstition by acknowledging religious belief as a metaphorical framework with which we construct a narrative context for our goals and works…. Satan stands as the ultimate icon for the selfless revolt against tyranny, free & rational inquiry, and the responsible pursuit of happiness.”
That’s jolly, but we here at Carpe Absurdum have an idea for a monument that we want to see go up in Oklahoma City, instanter. Our proposed monument is still in the drafting stage, but it might feature an eight feet tall David Lynch, honoring the supreme force of the multi-verse and the ground of all being, Cosmic Consciousness. Stay tuned.
Let us not forget, though, kiddos. At the heart of this issue is that whole separation of church and state thing that’s enshrined in that oft-cited, but barely read and understood document, The Constitution of the United States of America.
“… And the wavin’ wheat can sure smell sweet, when absurdity comes right behind the rain!”