According to Survey, Okahomans are Potty-mouth Jerks

As reported at the Atlantic, a survey conducted by the Marchex Institute finds that the state of Ohio is populated with a bunch of foul-mouthed pricks. Based on the handful of Ohioans that we have met, that comes as no f%&king surprise.

This particular player for Team Absurdum has been entrenched as a resident of Tulsa, Oklahoma for a damn long, [bleep-bleeping] time. Too long, me thinks in moments of tranquil reflection. How did Oklahoma fair in the survey?

Own it Okies! You too are rude bastards given to explicative. Cussin’ and being impolite tend to go hand-in-hand with being fearful, ignorant, paranoid and proud, which was originally the Oklahoma state motto. Metus, Ignarus, Suspiciosi et Superbus!

Little known historical fact: After a prolonged, and profanity laden debate in the year 1908, the Oklahoma legislature changed its state motto from Metus, Ignarus, Suspiciosi et Superbus! to Labor omnia vincit, which, of course, is Latin for “STFU and get to work.”

We are thinking, the survey by the Marchex Institute sampled too heavily from the Oklahoma City metro area in particular, and Central Oklahoma in general. If ever there existed a more inequitable and gratuitously rude s%!t hole than Central Oklahoma, we are ignorant as to its whereabouts. Tulsa is the only tolerable place to live in Oklahoma.

Okay. Perhaps I’m just a biased @$$hole.

But here we are, Oklahoma. And what are we to do? I guess it’s like what grandma used to say. “F%&k it.”

Here’s some snazzy, informative illustrations for you d!#kheads to look at.

Screen Shot 2013-12-03 at 9.15.27 AM

Screen Shot 2013-12-03 at 10.49.07 AMMaybe this absurdist should move to Arkansas where the other half of Team Absurdum resides. Looks like they’ve got some real nice, well-spoken hillbilly s.o.b.’s over there. Pig sooooey!

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